We're facebook friends in real life
Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Randomize
