Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
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