i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
What happened to fro yo and sex?
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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