guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
Randomize
