You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
No...this little piggys going to the bar
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
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