That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
