I want you more than these girls want KFC
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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