There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Randomize
