We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
what is it with giant penises always finding me
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Randomize
