I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Randomize
