you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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