Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
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