rhymes with "ouble enetration"
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
