Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize
