my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
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