Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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