omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Your mouth is God's brothel.
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize