I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Randomize
