the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
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