he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
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