And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
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