Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
Randomize
