just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
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