I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize
