he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
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