Midget sex pt 2 tonight
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
