what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
Randomize
