i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
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