the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
