yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
How's work?
Spinning.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize
