I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
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