I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
