I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize