i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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