Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
you were so drunk you tried to use the microwave as a calculator for your BAC
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Also, beer. Big fan.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
