Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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