i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
Your dad touched me again.
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
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