I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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