thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
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