Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Randomize
