So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Randomize
