it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Randomize
