Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Randomize