I'm drive I can fine osifer
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
My liver just had a heart attack.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Randomize
