I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Randomize