this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize
