Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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