he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Randomize
