spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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