Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
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